Injuries they never used to get

Mitchell Johnson won't be at the Rosebowl tomorrow. He's missing the England v Australia ODIs after his elbow was infected by a new tattoo.

Can't wait to see it though. Surely there's only two things you ever get tattooed on your elbow: A spider's web on the outside of it, or a hinge on the inside.

Given that they no longer play the Smokers vs Non-Smokers fixture, why not replace it with a new one: Tattooed vs Non-Tattooed. Might not be a bad game...

Fixtures They Don't Play Any More... But Could

1886, Lord's

Smokers versus Non-Smokers

Grace, who, despite being a qualified doctor, went through life mistakenly believing he only had one lung, played for the Nons. They won.

Nominations for the current smokers XI welcome...